Lost Thoughts
by Dreamweaver74
Summary: When Liz starts to have unsettling visions, HB and the team try to figure out what is happening to her, and why. HBLiz, AbeOC *May 1 2011* Chapter 5 up!
1. Lost Thoughts

This is just something I've been working on for a little while. Please let me know what you think, and if you'd like to read more.

I don't own anything here, merely the plot.

**Lost Thoughts**

**By D.C. Fleming**

Rain, the steady splash on the tiles below making patterns both familiar and frightening. It's her favorite weather, but even she has a limit when all there is, is rain. She runs to her apartment, slips the key into the lock.

A sound makes her recoil; against her better judgment, she goes inside anyway. The sight tells her she made a poor choice- furniture torn and ruined beyond repair, files tossed everywhere, fish tank shattered. She cries, trying to find something to put the clown fish and discus, and miniature eels into.

For most, it's too late, but there are two survivors.

"Ok, guys. Have to put you in something safe." She secures a new home for them, putting them on the counter.

30 minutes of surveying the place and most of what she's owned and held dear has been destroyed, or stolen. She grabs what little belongings she has left, and heads out.

_I've got to find Liz, _she thinks, moving as fast as she can from her ruined home.

Liz Sherman, enjoying her fourth cig of the day, headed over to HB's room. The past weeks after the whole Sammael event had finally brought them closer and both of them were enjoying the finer points of coupledom.

"So, you wanna go out tonight, or just stay here, and...you know," he wagged his eyebrows at Liz suggestively.

"Boy, do you ever take a break?"she giggled into his chest.

"Me? Well, I'm so offended, I thought you couldn't get enough of ol Big Red," he frowned with mock-hurt.

"Hey, HellBabe, don't pull the 'puppydog eyes' on me- I'm impervious to them," she laughed, getting up from the sofa.

Suddenly, her face contorted in a mask of pain, and she started to sink to the floor. "Oh my god!"

"Liz! What's wrong?" HB leaped from the sofa, catching her. She was shaking, causing blue flames to escape from her fingers and eyes.

"Babe, you gotta relax, at least til I can get Blue in here," he held on, trying to reach the com.

"It would appear that you are recovering from a form of psychic assault," Abe Sapien, doctor, resident psychic, trusted friend, and arguably the smartest life form at the BPRD, concluded. "Physiologically, I can find nothing to suggest otherwise. All of your blood work and scans are normal, but the psi readings... well. They are off the scale."

Liz frowned, still shaken from the experience. "Abe, how can that be? In all my life, I've never done _anything _like this before. A person has to pretty much spell out what they are thinking for me to get it, you know that! The only freaky mental 'gift' I possess is burning stuff to a crisp."

"Well, it would appear that you have a little something new to add to your resume," Abe nodded.

"What if I don't want this? Damnit, Abe, I didn't ask for this, for any of it. It's bad enough worrying that a heightened emotion or funky mood is going to set me off! Now you're telling me I get to invade other people's minds?"

Abe blinked, looking a shade wounded at her words. "I'm sorry, Elizabeth. I didn't realize you felt so strongly."

"Oh damnit, Abe, I wasn't thinking of how it must be for you. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," Liz was trying hard to keep from crying, but the realization that not only might she never be back to her former state coupled with the fact that she most likely offended one of the most important people in her life, made that nearly impossible.

"Liz, it's all right. I know you didn't mean what you said, please stop crying." He rushed over, taking her into his arms. "Shh, it's all right."

Liz tensed; almost immediately, Abe's large black eyes opened wide, and they pulled apart at the same time.

"Did you feel that?" They said in unison.

Hellboy sauntered in, freezing when he saw the two of them. "Hey, what's up?"

"Red, I think we've found her."


	2. The Search

Author's Note: I hope to update this weekly, at the very least. But my I, Robot story, 'The Path Toward Inevitability', is taking the bulk of my writing time, so please forgive the occasional biweekly post! And the short chapters, as well.

Thank you, Beth, Shadowcat, and Ithildi Blaque for your reviews; they mean a lot and are appreciated!

I don't own anything here, merely the plot.

-

She doesn't know where she is, doesn't know who she is. There are shards of glass beneath her, it's cold, and there's a small bowl at her feet with two small fish within. It's wet, and almost as an afterthought, she searches for something to cover up with.

The girl shakes her head, hoping that the blurry, impaired vision will subside; but it just gets worse. She tries to stand, but realizes the error in that too late; as she fades out again, collapsing on the slippery and icy ground below.

As she fades into unconsciousness, her last coherent thought is, '...Liz..'

-

The main meeting room of the BRPD is secure, as are all other areas of the secret organization. Triple thick steel walls prevent unwanted visitors, and the entire building is designed to effectively shield against inclement weather conditions.

All of which doesn't mean a lot when the invader isn't a corporeal being, but a thought, powerful and full of need, attempting to make contact.

They had been at it for hours, trying to figure out exactly where Liz's intruder was. She and Abe had an idea, but to Manning, their less-than-imaginative boss, it was going to have to be refined a bit more before he would let a team out to investigate.

John didn't want to be the one to voice it, but he knew it was on most people's minds.

"Liz, are you sure? I mean, you've been through a lot, suffered a completely traumatic experience. I couldn't feel your pulse, or anything. Maybe it's all in your-"

"OK, nanny, I don't really give a crap who believes this or not. I think we need to investigate this and see where it goes," her boyfriend growled, taking Liz's far smaller hand in his.

"Thanks, HB." She was thankful for the way he looked out for her, but couldn't help feeling unsure herself.

Suddenly, her eyes grew wide as a flash of images appeared in her mind. Everyone was watching, waiting for her to reveal whatever she was seeing, and looking just short of freaked in the process.

"It's her. There's something wrong, and I think she needs our help."

-

The rain hasn't let up, and as the agents from the BPRD search, it raises ever higher, over the tops of curbs and anything unlucky enough to be caught outdoors. extraordinary bright lights play on the darkest corners and niches of the street, illuminating even the most hidden recesses.

Still there is no sign of her.

There are at least 20 agents out, and one very large, red, humanoid, one slightly frayed pyrokinetic female with latent psi abilities, and a very psychic mer-man.

"HB, hold on." Liz was staring intently at the infrared detector they had taken to bringing on every mission now. Everyone was present and accounted for.

Including one more, just beyond their line of sight.

"Can you feel her, being so close?" He was trying to be supportive and careful. The fact was, he didn't have a clue what was happening to his girlfriend, but her safety was the paramount concern here.

"I'm not sure, this is too damn new," she was getting frustrated, and blue flames curled about her fingertips.

She quickly slowed her breathing, performing one of the calming techniques Abe taught her. It seemed to help, and she was better able to concentrate on her 'impressions'.

"I think she's just beyond that building, in the alleyway," she pointed, her voice barely a whisper.

"That's got to be at least a good 10 meters away, why are you whispering?" Hellboy, who was most definitely _not _whispering, replied.

"Because, she might be a good 10 meters away, but she can hear us just fine."

Abe turned back toward her.

"How do you know?"

"She just told me."


	3. Lost and Found

-1

The lights were too bright, the noise too loud, and there was a persistent vibration tingling through her veins. The bed she found herself on was comfortable enough, but the environment too alien to suit her taste. She tried to sit up, but discovered her arms were immobilized and worse still, when she attempted to seek out with her mind, the link was absent. "Liz, Liz, can you hear me? My god, where am I?"

"What the hell is going on," Liz paced, biting her lower lip. It was a new habit she'd taken to in the wake of her bourgeoning abilities. "Who do you think she is, why do we have this connection?" She, HB and Abe were in the observation room, watching the young woman from behind the relative safety of security glass.

"I can't explain it, but I feel like I know her. Well, sort of. " She turned away from the glass, puzzled. "When I had my little out of body experience, I wasn't exactly alone. I saw someone. I saw someone, and she knew my name. She…she asked for my help."

HB knew this was rattling his girlfriend, as evidenced by the blue flames that began to curl around her fingertips. "Babe, you never mentioned that before, why?"

"I didn't remember, until I saw her. Being temporally dead has a tendency to make a girl forget all kinds of things. But she asked for my help, guys. I think there's a really good reason why we found here, why she's here." She turned back toward the glass, watching the girl, trying to establish a mental link.

"It won't work, Liz. I administered a drug to impede her psi abilities, at least for the time being. I feel until we have a better idea of who and what she is, it's best to keep things dulled. She is in the best of care, and I will personally see that no harm comes to her."

"When can I talk to her?"

"She's awake, I don't see why you can't go now." said Abe as he and HB followed her into the hallway.

"No offence boys, but I need to do this on my own," she said, closing the door behind her.

The room was dimly lit, and the only sounds to be heard were the machines monitoring their patient's vital signs. Liz quietly pulled a chair toward the bed and sat down.

"I really don't know where to begin, but I guess the best place to start is the beginning. I'm Liz Sherman, and before we 'met', I was able to start fires with my mind. I work, and pretty much live here at the BRPD- Bureau for Paranormal Research and Defense. We investigate stuff that most would classify as the strange and unusual. Last year, a really bad man tried to take over the known universe, and killed me in the process. I think you and I ran into each other during that time."

The girl couldn't understand why she was there, let alone what Liz was telling her.

"I'm sorry, I don't really know who you are. I mean, I recognize you, but I don't know why. I already knew your name, and for some strange reason have been seeking you out. I know that as a little girl you accidentally caused the death of some girls at the orphanage you lived in, that you have trained yourself to keep from ever losing control again. I know that you are in love with a man who feels as though he's impossible to love, but is filled with devotion to you, and that I happen to be held in a place that was built by a man with so much honor and love that it is hard to believe that I shouldn't trust you. B-but, I don't know why I have this knowledge floating in my brain."

Liz smiled, she wasn't sure why, but innately she felt this girl could be trusted.

"It's going to take time, but we'll figure all of this out. Just know that you are somewhere safe."

Just then the door whooshed open, and Abe entered, HB close behind.

"I think its time to let our patient rest for a while. We have a busy day ahead of us."

"Sleep well, wait- I don't know your name."

Their guest smiled wanly. "That's alright. I don't know what it is either."

"Any impressions, feelings?" Abe inquired after their guest was safely under sedation.

"Wherever she came from, it was very cold, very dark. It felt a lot like…like some kind of limbo. It's not the best description, but it's all I can give you now. Gee Abe, kinda weird doing this sort of thing. Even if its limited to one person," Liz said grimly.

"C'mon babe, why don't we go for a walk? I think we could both use the fresh air."

Hellboy and Liz strolled through the BPRD grounds, the gentle crunch of fallen leaves under their feet.

"Red, what am I going to do? It's not like I have a lot of experience on the whole psychic thing." They sat down on one of the benches lining the path; it was early evening, and cool breezes chilled the air.

"We both know who does. I think you should ask him, you know he would do anything to help you. It's a good thing you've got a soft spot for big red guys, otherwise I might get jealous," he kidded.

She snuggled closer to her boyfriend, savoring the contact. " HB, I still feel so bad at what I said to him, I really didn't mean to hurt his feelings."

"I think ol' Blue understands, we've been friends for years and god knows how many times I've put my big foot in my mouth. Besides, he'd never turn down the chance to show off his smarts."

"You wanna know something," she asked, pulling him closer, "you are wonderful."

They kissed under the approaching starlight, in bliss if only for a short while.


	4. Slight Complications

Author's Note: Before we continue with the story, let me first just thank the following people for the wonderful reviews: superdani, Helena V., Beth, and elesettangyal. I hope you enjoy this next installment as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything here, save our "guest".

* * *

"Will it hurt?"

"Not in the slightest. I merely want to perform a light probe to see if we can't solve a few mysteries about our guest…plus, don't you think it be nice to call her something other than 'our guest'?" Abe smiled.

Liz had been full of apprehension ever since he made the suggestion to investigate the girl's memories….those they could access, anyway. It had been a plan simple in theory, but was quickly proving more problematic than any of them hoped. In order to provide the best access possible, the girl was no longer receiving the sedatives that dampened her abilities. As a result, Liz was the none too willing recipient of powerful, intrusive thought patterns.

"Thanks for the analgesic, Abe. I knew it was going to be challenging with her off the meds, but I wasn't ready for the onslaught. It's not that I don't want to get to the bottom of this, but I'm scared of forcing her to recall something she might not want to. What if we go too deep, cause irreparable damage?"

She was pacing again, blue flames flickering across her fingertips. She noticed before they became any stronger and began the breathing techniques Abe taught her.

"Elizabeth, please. We have been friends for quite a while now, and I hope you know I would never knowingly put someone's safety at risk. I think you should be there too. She knows you, trusts you. It will put her at ease, and help us learn more about her," he assured his friend, placing a webbed hand on her shoulder.

She took a deep breath. "Ok, let's go."

------------------------------------

Abe decided it would be more advantageous to conduct the link in a non-clinical setting, and since she'd taken a liking to the quiet confines of the library, that is where they began.

Three comfortable chairs, one small table, and a couple a candles facilitated the session.

"You're not going anywhere, are you?" she asked Liz, looking more than a little concerned.

"Not by a long shot," she gave what she hoped was a reassuring smile. It seemed to have the desired effect.

"Ok, there really isn't much you need to do, just relax, and let your thoughts wander." He leaned forward, extending his webbed hand, seeking out her dormant memories. "Try to let us, this room, fade away. Think about the day you were found by us….you were outside in the rain. Do you recall where you were prior?"

_There was a gentle tingling at the back of her mind; she was well aware of her current surroundings, but she could very clearly see the cold, dark alley she collapsed in days before. It was as though she was watching a movie as she hovered above; a young woman, no older than 25, wrapped in a heavy coat, dark brown locks just barely tucked under a blue knit cap. She willed herself closer, noticing the bowl of fish she protected. Suddenly, the images changed rapidly, the shift making her feel disoriented. Now she was in a classroom, surrounded by small children…..talking to people but she couldn't see any clear faces…images shifting again……running, impossibly fast, a painful whine in her ears getting louder……pain and disorientation overtaking her…… and this time a rush of information overwhelmed her…._

"Abe, something's wrong! Her breathing's erratic, and she's burning up!"

In all of his years conducting the mind probe, he'd never seen a response like hers. He tried to terminate the connection, but something was holding them together, something unbelievably strong. He felt as though all of the air was being sucked from the room, and his vision began to fail.

"Abe….Abe!! Oh my god, please wake up, someone help me!" Liz yelled, shaking her friend, but it was of no use. If help didn't arrive soon, she was going to lose them both. John and HB rushed in, alarmed but calm enough to move fast.

"We need to get Blue into his tank, now!"

"Liz, go get Dr. Salinger, and the crash cart," John yelled………

------------------------------------

Four hours later, Abe was safely ensconced in his tank, and quickly recovering. The girl was back in bed, her fever stabilized, and conscious once more. Liz sat at her bedside, watching as she came to.

"Hey."

"Liz? Wha-what happened? I feel like a truck ran over me," she sighed.

"What's the last thing you remember?"

"Just too much information, like I was overloading, or something. I guess I'm not making any sense. Oh, I think some of what your friend did worked, though. At least I remember my name."

"Well, let me be the first to say it's a pleasure to meet you-"

"…Freya. Freya Warner," she replied, giving her a tired smile. "How is he doing? I feel bad about him getting hurt because of me."

"It wasn't your fault, Freya. Abe thought, well, we all thought that this would be an ordinary session. None of us could've known what was going to happen. Wait- how did you know he was hurt? You were already passed out."

"I picked it up from you, silly. Apparently we've got some kind of mental connection, ha-ha."

"It seems like every other day I say this, but I'm not used to sharing my mind. Takes getting used to. Are you going to be alright?"

"I think so. I just need to get some rest."

"I'm going to see how Abe's doing; I'll be back later to check on you."

"When you go see him, please tell him I'm sorry anyway."

Liz nodded, leaving Freya to recuperate. As she headed to Abe's room, she couldn't keep from wondering why the girl had such an adverse response to the probe, and if there would be any lasting effects. So deep in thought she nearly ran into John, who was looking more than a little nervous.

"Hey you, everything ok? You look positively spooked."

"You're just the person I wanted to see; I was trying to look up info on Ms. Warner, and I found something interesting. I'm not quite sure what to make of it, but in light of the fact we work around the impossible, this shouldn't seem so odd, I suppose."

Freya turned in bed, sleep stubbornly refusing to come, her mind in synch with Liz's. She made the journey with them to John's office, and waited to see what he'd found.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Ok. An update, after over three years. Really sorry to all those who enjoyed this story, and the only thing I can say is that depression is a major pain, as well as killer of the muse (at least in my case!). So to those who still want to read this, thanks, and I hope you enjoy. Thank you to all who read/left a kind word/added me to your alerts!

I don't own any of this, save the plot. And Freya, of course.

"I don't understand, what in the world does this mean?"

"If my calculations are correct, it means that our Freya is actually over 100 years old. The photos and articles detail a 25 year old school teacher who mysteriously vanished during a rainstorm. One moment she was leading a group of third-graders, the next, nothing."

Liz shook her head, frowning. "Are you sure she's the same person, and not just a descendant? I mean, you know, there are some people who resemble their ancestors so much as to seem like a twin."

"Well, that was my first thought, so I checked all of the census records from 80 years out. There are no others in her line. I'll need to tell this to the powers that be," Agent Meyers said.

"Can you wait a couple of hours? I want a chance to talk to her before they do," she called, already out the door.

* * *

"Hi Freya. How are you feeling?"

"I've been better," she replied, smiling weakly. "My life hasn't been exactly joyous and ordinary lately. I don't know what to do, and I feel awful about what happened with Mr. Sapien."

"I know it looked really bad, but don't worry; he's going to be fine. Believe me, he's a lot stronger than he looks. But that's not exactly why I'm here. John brought something to my attention that's kind of odd. I came to talk to you about it first, before-"

"Before the unknown element up and goes crazy on everyone, right? I don't know what kind of information you happened upon, but why do I get the feeling everyone around here thinks I'm keeping some big secret? Liz, I'm just as confused as the rest of you. Two weeks ago I think I had a normal life, and now I can't remember anything about my past. Maybe I don't have one. Or much of a future, for that matter."

Liz pulled a copy of a black and white photograph from the pile, sliding it over to Freya.

"This is supposed to be me?"

"Yeah. Does it jog any memories?"

"No. I mean, it's me, that's my face, but I don't feel any connection to it at all. It's like I'm looking at a stranger."

She picked at the Cobb salad that made up her dinner, bewilderment crowding her delicate features into a frown. Across from her sat Liz, holding a stack of printouts. The commissary was empty, and save for the occasional 'click' of the thermostat, silent. Instead of beginning a full-blown interrogation, Liz had opted to speak to Freya on her own, without any interruption or distractions.

"I don't want to cause you alarm, but you've got to see my point of view here. I've just been given data that, if correct, would place your age at one hundred and twenty. You say you can't remember anything prior to a couple of weeks ago, the length of time you've been here. When Abe tried to help you unlock your memories, you, for lack of a better word, nearly 'overloaded'."

She stood up, shaking her head. "I don't know what to make of any of this, but within these walls are the most important people in my life. I want them to be safe."

Freya looked up, her expression unreadable. "What you're saying is that you don't trust me. Well, guess what? Neither do I. I want to get to the bottom of this as much, no, more than any of you. It's my life that's suddenly left my control, remember? And no, the only thing that photo does is frighten me more. I'd like to make a request though. I want to try working with Mr. Sapien again. I think we just may be able to make a break-through." She looked down, rapidly losing her appetite. "I'm scared, Liz."

"So much has gone on in a small amount of time, and it's very overwhelming. I understand, Freya, I really do. We share the same mind, remember? Look, I'll keep the brass from breathing down your neck for as long as I can, and try to see if Abe is well enough to try again." She turned to leave, pausing as she got to the door. "Wanna know something, Freya? I'm pretty scared too. "

* * *

Freya lay in her room, staring at the ceiling. In the space of a couple of weeks, she went from a semblance of normalcy to being the guest/prisoner of the BPRD.

Someone who very nearly killed one of its own.

She wondered how Abe was, and before the thought was completely formed, found herself outside in the hall, no more than a thought traveling gradually towards what could only be the psychic's quarters. She willed herself to move faster, and concentrating hard, arrived outside of his room. A tendril of thought reached out, and sought admittance. She could see him, suspended in his tank, asleep. She moved closer, peering at him, willing him to awaken. His eyes fluttered open, and he raised a webbed hand to the glass-Freya's eyes opened in shock.

She sat up in bed, looking about her in a state of confusion.

"He saw me?"

She still couldn't access the bulk of her memories, nor understand how such a talented psychic as Abe couldn't help. But she apparently formed a link with him, and at least now she knew he truly was alright. Small comfort, but in light of current events, any comfort was better than the fear and uncertainty she felt. And the information found by Agent Myer was didn't help, especially considering she couldn't remember a single thing about it.

She frowned, trying to force memories to the surface that seemed to have simply vanished. As far as she knew, she was a ….a..well, that was peculiar, she really couldn't recall what she'd been before all of this. It was as if someone came and stole all of who she was away. She shook her head and rose from the confines of her bed. It was time to get some answers.

She quietly turned the doorknob, peering though to see if the coast was clear. It would've been far easier if she wasn't still medicated, but she'd just have to make do with what she had.

"Miss Warner? Are you alright? Do you require assistance?" she felt rather than heard Abe as he said this. Perhaps the meds are finally wearing off, she thought.

"Y-yes, I think I might have gotten lost on my way back from the bathroom," she stammered.

"Perhaps, if you didn't already have a lavatory in your suite." She couldn't be certain, but she could've sworn the fish man was laughing.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing, I apologize if you mistook my concern for levity."

"Well, seeing as you most likely know exactly why I'm out of my room, perhaps you could help me figure something out…." She turned around to address him directly; there was no one in the long hallway save her.

"But..how..?" She gasped, confused. "Abe….where are you, exactly?"

"I'm currently in the south-west corridor, speaking with you," he replied, amused.

She looked around once more, trying to make sure her eyes weren't failing her.

"I don't think so, Mr. Sapien. I am the only person here. How can I hear you? I thought that only worked with Liz."

"It would appear that your abilities are more rich than you have believed, Ms-""Please call me Freya.""Of course. Freya."

She couldn't help herself but grin. He seemed to be making a real effort to help her; perhaps he truly was the one to help her get answers."My room is down the hall, perhaps we should talk there. I'll help you find the way."

"No need," she replied as she continued towards his quarters. "I've already been there."

* * *

"Abe, with the exception of Liz, I feel you are perhaps well-equipped to help me understand what's wrong with me. I try to reach back to a time before I was brought here, and I keep drawing a blank-nothing but snippets of a past that's as foreign to me as-"

"I am?"

She looked up at him, smiling."No, to be perfectly honest, not quite. I haven't known you but a short while, and yet you seem so familiar. I was going to say, as foreign as my own name."

"Freya, I'd like to try something else, if you'd let me. While my natural psychic abilities were less than successful, another technique might yield better results. I'd like to try a little guided imagery, if it's alright with you."

"Anything you think. I just want to get to the bottom of this."

"Good. Settle back and place your hands in mine. I'm going to ask you to imagine a set of images. I want you to empty your mind of anything that's happened here, of even your own experiences. I want you to think of a place where who you are and what you understand have no importance. I want you to picture a staircase with ten steps that lead into a dark, calm room. And when you reach this room, the whole of knowledge, anything you can possibly seek, is readily available to you."

She closed her eyes, letting the soothing tones of his voice wash over her. She found it incredibly easy to fall into an almost trance-like state, as Abe guided her into deeper zones of her mind.

"Freya, can you hear me?"

"Yes," she murmured, brown eyes fluttering shut.


End file.
